"To make a pleasant and friendly impression is not alone good manners, but equally good business." - Emily Post |
Etiquette was once the expected way of social behavior. People showed respect, politeness and good manners as they interacted with each other. Nowadays these ethical code has been slowly disappearing.
Today instead of people showing the basics code of politeness like saying; excuse me, please and thank you. They curse, shove and are plain rude. People who behave such ways don't realize that they are not only hurting others but they are hurting themselves. Those of us though that that have a sense of etiquette and show kindness have to deal with such people on a daily basis. At times, it would just be easy to give in and throw the towel.
So what are we to do to keep from becoming rude ourselves and to hold our composure when dealing with others? Gratefully there is Emily! Emily Post was a famous and a beloved etiquette expert during the turn of the century. The following are a few points in...
How to Deal with Rude People:
Don’t take it personally. Perhaps the offender is having a bad day. We all have been there ourselves.
Size up your annoyances. Is it worth it to make a fuss over something small, or is it a waste of your emotional time?
Set a good example. Rudeness begets rudeness. If you speak sharply to the bank teller, don’t be surprised if you get the same treatment in return.
Count to ten. When someone’s behavior makes you angry, take a few deep breaths and ask yourself, “Is it really worth blowing my stack over this?”
Laugh it off. If you can’t come up with a friendly joke, just chuckle and change the subject.
Let’s say someone cuts in front of you while you’re in line. Say something like "Excuse me, I was here before you." Some people just like to see how much they can get away with, so if you call them on their behavior, they're likely to retreat. You can also politely ask “Why are you cutting in line?” The person may be embarrassed enough to step away.
You want to ask a question at the doctor’s office, but the nurse keeps giving you the brush-off. We all know how hard nurses work. So sometimes they’re just swamped. You also deserve to have your questions answered. So try this: Figure out the nurse’s name. Then say, “Excuse me Joan – or Bill, or whatever their name is. I know you’re busy, but when you have a moment, I could really use some help.” People are more likely to go the extra mile for folks who call them by name because it creates a bond and makes the person feel closer to you – like you’re friends. Acknowledging the fact that they’re busy shows that you sympathize with their situation – which makes you seem friendly.
A salesclerk won’t help you. If you’ve made several attempts to flag them down, and they STILL won’t talk to you, politely say “If you can’t help me, I would like to speak to a manager.” This’ll usually motivate the clerk, because they don’t want to get the boss involved. Remember to SMILE while you’re talking to them – that lets the salesclerk know that you’re not aggressive or looking for a fight.
by Emily Post & Good Housekeeping
The Following are several of my favorites Emily's Post quotes:
"Manners are a sensitive awareness of the feelings of others. If you have that awareness, you have good manners, no matter what fork you use."
"The honor of a gentleman demands the inviolability of his word, and the incorruptibility of his principles. He is the descendant of the knight, the crusader; he is the defender of the defenseless and the champion of justice--or he is not a gentleman."
This is one that I especially have to really work on: "If you are hurt, whether in mind or body, don't nurse your bruises. Get up, and light-heartedly, courageously, good-temperedly, get ready for the next encounter."
Want to develop your Etiquette and Self- Confidence?
Thankfully The Emily Post Institute website offers great courses of etiquette! Besides their awesome collection of books they also conduct training in person and online through seminars to businesses and non-profit organizations. It's so awesome that Emily Post descendants are continuing to carry her legacy in helping teaching kindness and consideration to others especially in these changing times! And they are doing it with such grace and decorum.
For more info please visit The Emily Post Institute.
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