Greetings to all of my friends, and future friends to be! Thanks for stopping by Victoria Lee Jones Café Society! I know It's been a while since I had an episode written for my Victoria Lee Jones Café Society series. The reason that I had stop was because I had some personal doubts about continuing writing the series. And unfortunately because of that I decided to stop writing altogether. Biggest mistake ever!
I am not a professional writer by any means, and truthfully for me to become one it would take me a lot of schooling, time, money, and a lot of energy. Even if I had all of that, I wouldn't even embark on such a quest. Because writing is just one of the many hobbies and things that I love doing. I have more important goals and personal projects that are currently on my priority list.
So a writer perhaps may not be what I considered myself to be. So to be fair I called myself a storyteller. That way I won't end up offending scores of English literature fans. "What kind of poopy work is this?" I also wouldn't want to step on some writers toes and get scolded by them. "You call yourself an author? Are you kidding me?"
So you understand where I am coming from. But I can't help it, I just love writing.
For me writing is an es·cap·ism / əˈskāpˌizəm (had to add the pronunciation. Love the upside down e). Writing have given me a chance to go to places that I could only dream of. Imagining a story and seeing it developing is so rewarding!
So I thought that I would go ahead and give it a try. So I did.
I got out my Mickey Mouse notebook and started writing my first Victoria Lee Jones story draft. After writing several drafts I was ready to post it on my blog. So I thought!
Okey so my grammar stinks. And to make things worst I don't have an extensive vocabulary. Again I enjoy writing but, and I have to painfully admit my English was never really good.
Spanish happens to be my real mother tongue. It wasn't until the age of three that I started learning English. And for any bilingual people out there. I don't know if you had this experience or not. But I found out after giving it much thought that I never really learned well either languages.
My brain could only hold just enough English and Spanish to get by. Composing a well written sentence in both languages was out of the question. And up to this day I still find it a challenge to write something that makes sense.
But it's never too late to learn. And like with everything else in life. Practice makes perfect. So I put my best foot forward.
Fast forward. A year ago. After painstakingly correcting my awful grammar on all of my nine Victoria Lee Jones episodes, my editor advised me that I had to read more. He gave me a list of books to read. Then he said "It will help you to expound your English vocabulary and improve your writing." Oh okey, I get your drift. I stink. Then came the constructive criticism. "Your story was good and interesting. Though I was a bit confused. Like for instance I didn't get episode ten. I just felt that it didn't make sense with the rest of the story."
"What didn't you understand? Do you want me to explain it to you?"
"Just considered what I said. And just work from there."
Reality hits hard! I had to face the fact that my writing STINKS! And that I had a long, long way to go before it could be considered decent enough for a 6th grader to understand.
After I have put so much effort and thought on my story. I felt that I just didn't have it in me to become a decent storyteller. Although my editor's intentions were noble. He truly wanted to help me improve my grammar. I still felt bad. I felt like a deflated balloon, with no air left, so I went down, down to the ground.
At that time I was going through a very low time in my life. I had been dealing with severe health problems which left me physically inactive. Writing kept me going. It kept my mind active and happy. I considered it my intellectual therapy.
But like a sad balloon, I was punctured by the harsh reality. And I went crashing down to the ground. And I stayed on the ground, with no more desire to continue flying.
So I decided to step away from it all.
I took on other hobbies and interest.
Fast forward to now.
I missed it! I missed writing. Just putting my thoughts into words is one of the best gifts that brings me inner contentment and joy! I shouldn't have allowed my doubts and insecurities to interfere with what was wholesome and rewarding for me.
Has my English improved while I was away? Nope. As a matter of fact, eight months of no writing except for some text messaging and sending emails, has set me back, way back.
But here I am a stinky storyteller ready to continue to write again.
And I am totally excited to writing my Victoria Lee Jones series for you all.
I am back again flying in my air balloon. Can't wait to experience the joy of flying with you again!
Sincerely Yours,
Carmen Johnson
